Episode 64: The Integrity Trap - Can following through for everyone else be breaking you down? with Natasha Skolny

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Have you ever crushed your goals, hit the title, got the team… and still felt hollow? This conversation is a reset for high-achieving helpers who keep promises to everyone but themselves. Leadership coach and former HR exec Natasha Skolny (The Leadership Cabin) digs into what integrity actually means, why indecision drains our power, and how to re-align without burning bridges—or yourself.

In this episode, Kathy & Natasha discusses:

The integrity trap: keeping promises to everyone else while breaking your own
Decide, then do: cutting off options to end overthinking and regain momentum
Boundaries that hold: regulate your nervous system, then communicate clearly
Conflict as opportunity: lead with curiosity (“Can you help me understand…?”) to move forward together
Values → alignment: audit tolerations, forgive past selves, and rebuild self-trust
From burnout to bandwidth: spot decision fatigue and use AI to clear tasks so humans can connect

00:00:00 Why “doing it all” can still feel empty; meet Natasha + The Leadership Cabin

00:04:14 From HR fire-fighting to coaching leaders (and herself)

00:06:17 Heartbeat vs. flatline: feeling the highs and lows (Kathy’s story)

00:08:29 “I can’t be myself at work”—what female leaders tell Natasha

00:13:25 The integrity trap: keeping every promise… except your own

00:16:59 Decide = “to cut off”: ending the spin

00:20:20 The cost of misalignment: burnout, exhaustion, decision fatigue

00:23:53 AI as space-maker: automate tasks, deepen human connection

00:31:29 Hearing yourself again: values, tolerations, and time to think

00:32:10 Team work: trust rises when people say what’s true

00:36:12 Rethinking conflict: from threat to path forward

00:44:41 Four steps before the hard convo (regulate → clarify → schedule → speak)

00:48:03 Year-ahead reset: honest inventory without self-shame

00:52:56 Forgiveness of past selves + deeper gratitude

Website: [The Leadership Cabin]
Instagram: @theleadershipcabin
LinkedIn: Natasha Skolny
Natasha Skolny is a leadership coach and founder of The Leadership Cabin, after 20 years in HR helping senior leaders develop voice, clarity, and teams that actually work. She now teaches high-achieving professionals to lead themselves first so their impact—and integrity—match.

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